EXCLUSIVE: REAL LEAKED Minutes from School Council March 2014

With March 6th's School Council Meeting, we at the Trash acquired the hot-off-the-press notes from said meeting, which means it's that time of the year where Cllr. Hugh G. Rection gets to have a go at what we think should be named the School Bureau of Bureaucracy. This article, again, pretty much wrote itself, as we received notes from one very disgruntled Councillor, who's notes we would class as 'snarky' in the least.

The first item on the agenda was that "Quality of school meals dropped". Beneath this was the point that simply said "portion size". Perhaps, and this is a long shot, but they actually read the detritus people feed into the Suggestion Boxes, as this was raised some time ago with the suggestion "Stop shrinking the Jelly!!!". It is true that portion sizes are getting smaller, and, as proper nourishment is one of the Rights of a Child, the school should really make inquiries.

It won't though.

Many of the other points on food were the same, venial witterings that we always encounter with the School Council, including one asking for "PERFECTION", which seems a little optimistic since the standard of catering at the moment is 'Just About Edible', some of the kitchen staff perfecting the art of making something to be both burnt and frozen at the same time. However, more on the Caterlink situation will be said in Heywood Jablome's study on the subject this Friday.

The next point on the agenda made us very pleased here at the Trash, as it simply goes "House system – maybe not", which is what we have been saying for the last two Real Leaked Minutes. This not only goes to show that the Councillors are sane of mind, but also the student voice is making it through to our representatives if written scathingly on a blog. A house system is vindictive, divisive and stupid; no wonder the Head probably favours it.

Then we got a little annoyed. Under the next point, about after school activities, it is written "Teachers to take it more seriously". We at the Trash believe that teachers take our education very seriously, and we are well endowed with the fact that teachers spend many an evening revising with students or running extra-curricular activities. Make no mistake when we condemn the extra-curricular activities situation, we are condemning the lack of funding and variety in activities, not teacher commitment. On this matter, we firmly stand with the teachers.

Item 4 reads "Rebuilding ‘cheap’ playground". As this is a secondary school, we don't have a playground. We have the Head's Helipad Quad, the Smoker's Area Bike Sheds and that hill at the back, but no ''cheap' playground'.

Item 5 talked of "Older Years helping Younger Years" which is, of course, is a stupid idea, as older years are normally busy with these little things called exams, which means having to deal with a snotty little Year 7 kid would just send them over the edge.

Item 6 then went on to propose we replace Caterlink with KFC outlets. We are sure there are problems with Camden saying something about healthy eating, but we have to agree that students would like it more, be happier for learning and definitely more full. Unfortunately, Hampstead has already brokered a deal with Sam's over this matter, so a KFC contract would be void.

Then the idea of a more transparent School Council was raised, and this was actually a decent point. Why do you think we publish these leaked minutes? Of course, Lord of Darkness Mr. Szomebodytoldmekowski probably doesn't prefer transparency, it usually leads to people knowing what he's up to. He doesn't like that.

There was a shout as well for "MORE PUBLICITY!!!" for the School Council, but we are unsure as to why; everyone already knows they are useless. Then, we move onto the notion of a "Year council suggestion box". Again, not worth the money. If we wanted to be listened to any less we would simply strike up a conversation with one of the SLT.

I could go on, but the effort it would take would involve some hefty opiates to overcome the frustration. I suggest you read the minutes, especially the 'snarky' ones, as they are just funny on their own, the link is here. Whilst talking to the Councillors, we found out that, in a conversation about certain claims made by "that pissing blog", the teacher that oversees the School Council said that they had "only been responsible for two of the bins". This, despite trying to exempt the School Council from the millions of bins that plague the school, actually makes them look even worse than already, as it means that the School Council, when shoving in our face the fact they had done this massive campaigns on bins, was actually taking the glory from someone else.

I wonder who else does that...

DISCLAIMER: This Hampstead Trash article has been written to critique the actions of the governing bodies of the school. This is so student readers can hear both sides of the argument, and formulate their own opinions on matters pertaining to their education.