The Not-so-Great Game

Do you remember the good old days, when we had not one but two cages where students could tear their knees up freely on concrete and unconvincing astro turf? Yeah, well tough - those times are over.

With the arrival of the new build, there is no longer a sizeable enough horizontal space for playing football anymore, leading students to trip over themselves and others in that now gloomier-than-the-head’s-average-thought space under the ‘New’ Block (or soon to be No Block At All Block). After all, the outdoor space is for playing in, and students have been encouraged by little-known boy band The Government to be active, even if the outdoor space at Hampstead has been reduced to the size of Thumbelina’s libido. And how have the Management responded to this enginuitive, advantageous spirit from students?

By confiscating the footballs. Yes, as well as not being able to run, you're not allowed to kick a ball either, all in the name of health and safety (because everyone knows that well known saying ‘to put an Umbro in the works’).

The school would probably argue that this is a short period in which football is not allowed that is necessary to renovate the school, so that students can use the large playing in a couple of years. Because, of course, all the students attending now will be attending in two years, and students don’t have the right to play, and that right only applies when it is convenient. To paraphrase that great Pink Floyd song: “Teachers, leave those kid’s balls alone!”