Thursday 10 March 2016

Nigerian Cock Hidden from Public View as deemed 'Obscene'

After a long and heated campaign by students, the school has been forced to remove the statue of a bronze cockerel from the assembly hall, as the piece was seen as an 'obscene' object to be revered.

The item had been looted during the British colonisation of what is now known as Nigeria by Lord Haberdasher XVIII, and had stood erect at 2-foot tall until the present day. Complaints about the large Nigerian cock being on show constantly said that it was "overbearing", "came in a dark place" of the school's history, and "made white people feel bad".

A spokesperson for the school's artefact collection - which houses the original motivational banner, the only surviving toilet lock, and the Head's second face - said that "it was only right that the cock be returned; we've had our fun with it". The tipping point for the school came when reports of prospective parents finding the piece 'unnerving' and 'in-your-face', as well as an incident involving a student mounting the cock.

Repatriation of the item is set to take place as soon as the school receives the necessary funds in their bank account from a Nigerian prince.



To view the original, real, non-spoof, BBC News article about the Nigerian cock of Jesus College, Cambridge, click here.

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