Friday, 24 October 2014

Enrichment Day - East Quad gets Uranium

East Quad, famously part of the old Eastern ('New') Block, has recently announced they have gone nuclear, and have called (today) Friday Enrichment Day, so called after the process.

Controversial new leader of the rogue state Sum Long Ting made the announcement last Monday, and has been met with political outcry from other sections of the school, Preston Montgomery Saddleton saying in a speech: "Bwuauaah!" 

Maximillian Oscar-Oolong, commenting from his post in the twin school in Brussels, said "Bwer, well, if we, err, they, err, get nuclear power, we might actually start having to care about them. A-wibble." However leader of the school council, Farah Wayward, was not so quick to be appalled by the news. In a statement she said: "I hope that, come next year's elections  we can grow a prosperous relationship with East Quad, just as we have with Highbury & Kynaston."

This is not the first section of the school to have radioactive capabilities, with West Quad developing Weapons of Mass Disappointment, in what was known as the Science Block Project. It is rumoured that these have been used by the infamous Year 7-snatching technician, whose subsequent dumping of bodies in the Pond has led to Three Eyed Fish. 

The rest of the school waits with unabated breath.

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