Wednesday, 20 November 2013

Dem Trousers

EDITORS: The following is the first article by Drew Peacock, the first in a batch of new reporters who will be beginning their columns in the coming weeks.

Okay guys, let's talk about uniform, (when I say "let's" I mean stop split-screening this with porn or Facebook or both, and focus your attention right here).

In previous and numerous assemblies we have always been told that we cannot waste time on uniform anymore, but I really don't think having my shirt tucked in changes anything about my grades. It's fair enough if I wear a leopard-print thong and bright pink trainers (and only a leopard-print thong and trainers), but really, black trousers are black trousers, so what if they are jeans? They are black jeans, same damn thing, as long as they have the color black, it doesn't make any  difference. Also, the quality or fabric of my trousers changes bugger all anyway; if I see someone with black jeans, I'm not going to feel intimidated. They cost just as much as black school trousers and they look a bit cooler, but I'm not going to think about it for more than 25 seconds maximum, and that's too long to think about someone else's clothes anyway (...ladies...)

My point is, no one actually cares about other peoples' attire, and I doubt that it "offends" anyone or makes them feel less important, so why do the SLT make a fuss about it? When I asked SLT staff and The Head, they  answered the question with "School rules". I thusly asked why it was in the school rules and they answered  "Because we are a uniform school". And then, when I asked why we were a uniform school, the SLT staff answered "because we are", which of course is a very advanced explanation, that comprehensively put me in my place for sure. The Head, however, did try a bit harder, and said "because not everyone can afford expensive clothes, and it's so they don't feel embarrassed".

My first thing to say to that is that the whole school uniform together costs more than a t-shirt, shoes and a pair of trousers or jeans. Anyone can go out and buy shoes, a T-shirt, pants and trousers for less than the price of a Hampstead Blazer. Secondly, if we did a poll about whether or not you give a crap if someone has a Gucci belt and Nike shoes, it would be so stupid that no one would even bother doing it. OK, fair enough if they don't want inappropriate clothing, but that's not a reason to stop someone from learning because they don't have their jolly "learning clothes" on; just ask them not to wear that again and wear essentially normal clothes, something not too revealing, and that's it, its not like the world's going to end or something, because students are normally responsible enough to dress normally. It just makes the students happier and more comfortable, therefore making it easier to learn, and a happy student is a good student. And the SLT want nothing more than 'good' students for their 'good' school.

DISCLAIMER: This Hampstead Trash article has been written to critique the actions of the governing bodies of the school. This is so student readers can hear both sides of the argument, and formulate their own opinions on matters pertaining to their education.


  1. also also also. they have a friggin problem with headscarf's too. fucked up school bruuv -_- and they'll either send u home or put u in the I.E.U for wrong uniform when I could be chillin in my class learning friggin 1920's

  2. I want the blazer hood. do u really sell it?