Monday, 30 June 2014

Who wants a piece a'pizza?

In a culinary coup d'├ętat, processed sweet corn and some other thing that we couldn't actually identify, have found themselves on the top of everyone's favourite open-faced squeeze-of-ketchup and brick-of-melted-cheese sandwiches, briefly. However, the appearances of these new toppings have been few and far apart, with mushrooms joining the pizza only when the planets align, seemingly.

Speculation as to what the newfound dirt and detritus on the pizzas has found a few money saving solutions, which Caterlink may have adopted.

  1. The shredded remains of Camden council's integrity. (This is unlikely, as none has ever been reported existing).
  2. "Listening Rules" Mind Control PillsTM (Like in that episode of Doctor Who that one time).
  3. Mushrooms (No, the other kind.)

Failing these guesses, we have come to assume that they were actually the advanced stage lice of a soot-covered year seven urchin.

"I don't really care about what's in my pizza, just that I can buy it and eat it. Let's talk about the real issues here, stop shrinking the jellies!", put Mohammed Labanah King Jr., student activist. He later added, "What is a tomato?".


The Trash apologises for publishing an article on food during Ramadan


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