Guest Article: School Incapable of Doing Anything Competently

A guest article about the trials and tribulations of An Evening with the Stars.

Today many students will have received a badly photocopied leaflet (as is the school's custom) advertising the school’s upcoming ‘Evening With The Stars’. The propaganda described the even as a “showcase of artistry, creativity, flair and originality”. Where do I begin?

I have my reservations about the 'originality' of any Hampstead performance, as this blog's startlingly accurate prediction of last year's Christmas Assembly showed. With slight variation, any Hampstead performance consists of: a dance act with the dancers dressed in black, as if they’re miming a funeral procession, a soloist who gets a cheer every time they sing a high note, and must only ever sing Feelin' Good, a band who must always play Smells Like Teen Spirit and a choir who demonstrate how they have mastered the art of singing in near-unison. Equally 'creativity' has its limits when, year on year, more money is taken away from Performing Arts, to the point where the only creative thinking is working out how to get around the lack of working equipment and instruments. If the management was aware of what they were doing to the creativity of the school, rather than ignoring it, then this might not be an issue.

Awareness evidently isn't part of the SLT's skill set, as is competence. The school sent out these leaflets today (8th July for those of you who can’t count) and the event is tomorrow (the 9th) on the day of a 24 hour tube strike, which was, of course, planned about two months ago, apposite time for a school to change the date of a performing arts event, don't you think? This, coupled with the sending of leaflets to students and parents the day before the event, means it is unlikely many people will be able to attend, which is a shame, since students put so much effort into these performances, and the school couldn't be arsed.