Texts & Mugs & Rock & Roll

Teachers from Manchestead School's history durpartment last week announced the formation of a staff band. Inspired by a major period of history they teach, in a statement they announced their name as 'Joy Division'. When asked about the sound of the band, Ian Organ, frontman, described it as "an arabica blend of the Kaiser Chiefs, the Doors and Ask Hannett". When they were then 'spontaneously' questioned on the origin of their name, they answered:

"Well, like, when we was young there was this classic chune, 'Lets Dance to Joy Division', and we was always fascinated by them Wombats." answered A. English-Teacher. "I think it's fair to say that without the Wombats there wouldn't be no Joy Division."

Interviewer: Rather... Um, Interesting... What can your fans expect to hear from you in the near future?

[Bass player chokes]

Organ: "We've got this record coming out - we recorded the whole thing in a massive hall - yeah one of them proper big ones. We wrote one about the Head called 'He's Lost Control' but that got censored."

Interviewer: And, if I may, why the choice of name?

Other guy: "Well, we didn't want to stand on Ceremony. When we were talking, it was just something in the Atmosphere. Obviously, we didn't want to be responsible for any Disorder, so we had to use names approved by the Head."

The Head's press office initially refused to comment, however, when pressed for a response, replied: "While we respect the work of the SS, quite simply put we can not even entertain the idea of employing individuals, especially those who display aspiration and passion."

As it seems, Love Will Tear them Apart, as a new line-up today declared a name change to 'New Order' after re-reading their GCSE textbooks, in a bid to make the band sound less Nazi-influenced.