Thursday 17 September 2015

A* at Jumping Through Hoops

"A lot of my assemblies are going to be about time, and how little of it we have left." squealed a certain T. Dum, who seemed to be particularly fond of his PhD, who sources say pertained to measuring worms. This is how the SLuT address teenagers who have shuffled lifelessly into the asbestos filled comprehensive that we call 'good' for the last five years; like tools to be manipulated or even discarded for the sake of halting the steady decline of Hampstead's fabricated position in the league tables.

As well as Szhe'llbecomingroundthemountainwhenshecomeskowski's new-found obsession with uniform and punctuality, Cricklewood Community Comprehensive now features a shorter lunch break and an extremely cramped playground. Whilst a certain orange member of government would be quick to cry out "your loss is our gain", current Year 11's (and years above) have to experience all the negatives and none of the benefits that have arrived in the form of a land-consuming building project, which was supposed to have begun when the current Year 11's were but irritating Year 7's. 

These factors are heavily compounded by looming GCSEs, however, must the turd-stained rags that 5 years of work have been leading up to really be looming? The constant reiteration of inane [fruity language] has the end result that very little time is spent doing anything other than pretending to be revising, rather than actually revising. Furthermore, the environment fostered by the SLuT is one that strongly discourages innovation and fluidity; the rigid lesson structures and arbitrary rules expected by Joe or Jane Management when he or she pokes their inextricably similar faces round classroom doors simply do not work at GCSE. GCSEs have a significantly greater depth in comparison to KS3, and classroom discussion is necessary to familiarise students with the subject matter. The fundamental flaw in the way students are prepared for GCSEs at Hampstead School is born from the fact that those who shape (quite forcefully) the school environment simply do not care; they are only there to maintain a quota, and, of course, prevent any form of individuality - we are simply statistics, to be distorted or discarded, to generate a false image of our school. After all, what is a student, if not a brilliant photo opportunity?


DISCLAIMER: This Hampstead Trash article has been written to critique the actions of the governing bodies of the school. This is so student readers can hear both sides of the argument, and formulate their own opinions on matters pertaining to their education. This piece is entirely the opinion of the writer.

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