Friday, 26 February 2016

Op-Ed #6

Sylvia Ryver-Raine writes:


Peace, yeah. Today was like, you know, the Green Party Conference, and so we all met for circle time in the Ecology Area to talk about important things like, you know, bears and trees and the corruption of the human soul by capitalism. After having a coca cola break, we got down to the serious business of making windcatchers and knitting beanie hats for cold penguins.

After sitting round the campfire, smoking some... er... nature, we all congratulated one another on our mutual dislike of nuclear weapons, and resolved that we would try and get the damn Tories in the Student Council to get rid of all of Hampstead's nuclear weapons, using our powerful voting block of one, because, like, bombs are, like, bad and they do kill lots of people which is bad.

Finally, we had an impassioned and powerful speech by our great and glorious leader, half-platypus Natalie Benevolent, who spoke a lot about numbers, and how numbers to do with the economy are broken down. For example, er... um...

There were many things that we could take away from the conference, not least of which that we need to use our great political influence to stop the Trident programme! Gums don't kill people, but wrappers do!

So, like, you know, like, peace, yeah.

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